Chimera Consultancy’s Recommendations to Prime Minister Theresa May

This week Chimera Consultancy (advisors to big brands Apple, Peach, Melon, Mammon, Moloch and McDonalds) offered Prime Minister Theresa May some simple advice that, if adopted, would solve many of the UK’s big problems, including crime, education and health.

Here are the recommendations in full:

Recommendation one: the NHS

We recommend you replace the NHS with Chimera Wealthcare. We are at the cutting edge of unethical profiteering.

Recommendation two: education

We recommend you replace all schools with Chimera EduOutlets, run by Mechamanagers and staffed by robots.

Recommendation three: law and order

We recommend you outsource all policing to Chimera Insecurity Services. Crime figures will plummet when there are no police officers left to record (let alone investigate) criminal activities. Home Secretary Amber Rudd has already expressed an interest in this recommendation.

Recommendation four: the army

We recommend you disband the army and replace it with Chimera MaxiKill, your comprehensive war solution.

Recommendation five: religion

We recommend you abolish all religions and make attendance at the Church of Chimera compulsory for all. Worship of MEGACROCODOG should be everyone’s civic duty. Chimera puts the fun in fundamentalism!

Recommendation six: government

We recommend you abolish the government and appoint Nigel Farage as CEO of United Kingdom Enterprises Ltd.

—–

Any similarities between these recommendations and those made by Chimera Consultancy to David Cameron in 2014 are purely coincidental.

Advertisements

search:engine / search (engine)

James Knight (explorer)

James Knight (carpenter)

James Knight (diplomat)

James or Jim Knight is the name of

Steak knife murder: Mother’s pain over James Knight death

James Knight | Faculty of Philosophy

James Knight – Arcadis

James Knight is an Executive Board Director of Bonhams and Chairman of the Motoring Department

James Knight Profiles | Facebook

James Knight of Mayfair Ltd

In 1715 James Knight was the first person to go in search of the North-West Passage in over 80 years

James Knight – the Centre for Embodied Wisdom

James Knight – University of Sussex

James Knight – I am the Bird King

James Knight – iMA creator and Master Practitioner

James Knight | LinkedIn

James Knight Transformation

James Knight – YouTube

James Knight has more than ten years’ experience working in emerging market countries as a journalist

James Knight | Content Writer

The latest tweets from James (@jamesaknight)

James Knight is the Founder and Managing Partner of Keystone Law

James Knight | Mono. Prophetic of the surrealist nightmare that is Donald Trump’s presidency

James Knight | Ashurst

James Knight – Spire Solicitors

Regular columnist James Knight reflects on the fact that God came to earth as man

James Knight | Augusta

Contact James Knight

James Knight | The mannequins are more real than you

Mr James Knight

James Knight – IMDb

james knight, Author at SEMA4

James Knight Obituary

James Knight – UCL

James C. Knight – Google Scholar

Counsellor James Knight

James Knight is met by some determined defence as North Walsham take on leaders Chingford

How to get to James L Knight Centre in Miami by Bus

“The Bird King’s employees” by James Knight

“This listing is about the future,” says James Knight

James Knight – Business School Blog

James Knight Archives

Bournemouth Facebook fraudster James Knight, 25, posted adverts selling products such as iPhones, iPads and laptops on the social media site

James Knight Coaching | Leadership is a spiritual act

James Knight is fundraising for Hawk Conservancy Trust

James Knight is not a poet

James Knight Insurance

Illinois Athletics – James Knight

james knight – minor literature(s)

James Knight | The Maine Real Estate Network

JAMES KNIGHT LIMITED

James Knight, PhD > Genetics

James Knight | Psychotherapist

James Knight – eliteprospects.com

James Knight Farms

James Knight & The Butlers – Black Knight (Vinyl, LP)

James Knight | A coffin or cocoon, a hollow container. To avoid disappointment, don’t expect to find a fleshy thing pulsating inside

Through innovative gentle yoga sequences, also referred to as Somatic Movement Flows, James Knight will guide you to unlock your body’s response to

James Knight – ancestry.co.uk

James Knight Jewellery

Images of James Knight

Images by James Knight

James Knight Statistics

Dr James Knight: Anaesthetics

James Knight | Yacht Sales

James Knight knife art

James Knight (Fuel Management Consultant)

DESCENDANTS OF JAMES KNIGHT

James Knight and Fanny Ross Clark married in the fourth quarter of 1896 in the Horsham registration district

Saturday night with James Knight

When I read James Knight’s poetry, it reminded me of the first time I was taught about death